Remember the good old days when regular, degular vanilla porn would get the job done within two seconds? No? You’ve always been a degenerate? Why am I not surprised…

It seems as though things are only getting worse as your brain calcifies and the only things that can get you off are really, really fucked up. Things that if anybody found out, you’d be laughed at. Ostracized. Made out to be the freak you definitely are. But what’s worse? Living a life watching the same things over and over, never to be enchanted by the unknown (holes violated in 10,000 different ways) ever again? That’s no way to exist.

You know what you really want. Pussy feels so good, but you know what feels even better? Feeling her squirt and pee all over your face. You know what would feel best? Feeling her squirt and pee all over your face, right after getting her holes filled to the brim with another man’s cum.

Don’t act like you’ve never thought about it, though any fantasy you’d paint in your mind would only ever be an amateur version of the real thing. So wet, so smooth, and not for you to empty yourself in. No, that’s another man’s job, but you honestly think you might have the better end of the deal with the obscene amount of mess you’re left to clean up. It’s not like he’s a little bitch with little bitch loads. No, he cums so much and it’s alllllllll for you to lick up.

I suppose we’re straying from the main event. It’s so important for a goddess to pee right after sex, but it’s even more imperative she get the rest she requires after have her guts fucked out. Here’s where you come of use: with great care not to fuck over her holes TOO much more than they’ve already been, you will coax her little peehole to open with your tongue. This isn’t going to be just a few licks. This is going to be you massaging her clit with your tongue first, and then running your tongue up and down her slit until she relaxes, and you can almost fit the tip into her urethra. You’re going to fuck it open until she can’t hold it in anymore, which is when you’re going to execute the most important part of the whole procedure: you will ease a catheter into her hole, while continuing to lick her clit. She’s going to do her best not to release—an involuntary response—and you will have to hold a vibrator to her most sensitive spots in order to break her will, and you will have to hold tight, because she will squirm. Her clit will swell to the likes a small rosebud which is when she won’t be able to control herself any longer, creating a device with which you may place into your mouth and suck on like it holds the elixir of life itself. Hot gold will push its way directly down your throat, hitting your gag reflex and at times going down the wrong pipe (a treat for you to cough up and taste later), with no resistance from you of course, lest you waste a single droplet. It will seem endless, the combination of squirt and pee going from her body into yours, and you’ll forget to breathe, never having thought the idea of drowning could be so fun. As the last few drops trickle down your lips she removes the catheter and plants your face into her holes, ensuring you never get a breath of air, but you can’t think of a more beautiful way to leave this earth, her nectar now coursing through your veins.